Lover’s Dilemma

Sometimes it is tough to manage the mixed emotion of hurt, pain and anger. What can one do to stop it? When its too much to bear..when you are surprised how much you expect and what you get.

At these times I am reminded of the Lady Antebellum song.

“…and I wonder if I ever cross your mind…”

I am a human being and I have expectations. Should I apologise for being such an ordinary human being? I want to love and be loved in return.

He loves me he loves me not.

So many reasons to love me not. I was not always this unlovable! My aunt loved me when I was a little girl. I still miss her. Sometimes when i am alone, i think of her, watching me over and smiling and saying,”hey its all going to pass.” I know its just me trying to motivate myself.  Now that I am grown up and looking for love, I have become the most unlovable girl.

The wonderful man I met, loves me.

The wonderful man I met, loves me not.

Still I want to cry on his shoulders. I want to watch him sleep. I want to hold his hands. I want to see him make funny faces. I want to hold on to good memories. I want to make new memories.

‘Do you want the same?”

“I love you more, I love you not.”

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